Aham asmi/ I am (haibun)

The wires must be tightened and slowly but surely, the plant will grow into what you want it to, is what I have heard. Sensei is aghast, no, angry! Where did you hear that? In a magazine. In Japanese? No, in English. He proceeds to admonish me.

“We  grow and harmonise with nature. That is the philosophy of Bonsai. We do not expect the tree to reach a final shape or destination. We accept the living tree, just like we would, a spouse or child. Completely. And meet our own self in the tree’s existence and appreciate the being in all its asymmetry.”

playing Jenga
a hole in the high tower
of expectations

“Meet the plant every single day, as you are. And you will be met by the plant, in the condition it is in the present moment.” 

I ponder this statement by sensei. He invites me to hold the 40-year-old Baobab tree. I place my palms around its tiny trunk and close my eyes. I feel the energy flowing into my hands.

Autumn sun
a dream takes root
in the shallow tray